Sunday, 1 May 2011

I'm sorry but I can't be arsed thinking of a title...

Sorry I've been away a bit again - theres no excuse really I just haven't had anything to say.

I go back to college on Tuesday, then I have two weeks until I finish. Like forever. TWO FUCKING WEEKS! What the fuck am I meant to do with two shitty bollocking weeks - four months worth of assignments and coursework in two fucking weeks!

Sorry I'm venting - again.

I'm bricking it, I really am. I have no excuse for not doing the coursework I just can't be bothered. Like I've told myself, just do it - yes it's boring but it's only for a while then you'll be done - blah blah blah

But christ I'm just so lazy.

It really is the most boring course anyone ever thought up ever - I have no idea what possessed me to do it in the first place.

Anyone thinking of a business course?? Don't fucking do it!!

I'm sorry, I'm just really shitting myself because this can work out 1 of 2 ways:
1)I somehow manage to pull it out of my arse and actually pass this course, then in two weeks I'm finished and then I have to find a job - a proper full time grown up job


2)I completely fuck it up, fail miserably, waste two years of my life, then have to find a job with 4 shitty GCSE's and nothing else.

I'm pretty buggered either way I think.

There are very, very few jobs around me right now - I am quite limited to where I can look for work because I live in a wee village and there are never any jobs here, so the only other place I can look is in town, because then at least theres buses and stuff, because I can't really rely on people for lifts all the time either.

So that leaves me pretty limited.

I'm fucked I mean I wouldn't hire me to do anything -
I have four GCSE's: English, Home Economics, and a double for ICT, a pass grade for my BTEC Business (If I'm lucky) and a key skill in maths (if I'm lucky)
oh and one months work experience for my whole 18 years of being alive.


Sorry, sorry, sorry - I'm just having a mini freak out.

Oh christ I am actually fucked


  1. My dear, dearest one.
    Stop worrying yourself, there is no point.
    You have to think that you have to be better than the lasy side of you.
    Think about the future, that is the only thing that matters, for now you are at the age that matters the most.
    You are way to intelligent for some shitty job. Think as even you said, it is about the future.
    And in two weeks you are done, of course that after those two weeks you will have other matters at hand but at least you can look for a better job than lets say waitress.
    I am not necesarry saying that being waitress is a shitty job, but you cannot cover all your expenses form that kind of job:)
    I have all my trust in you, and you know that you will do just fine.
    Take your butt out of that chair/sofa/whatever you are staying on and do your work, then you will feel better.
    Breath in, breath out, I love you

  2. anytime, my love:)
    If it helps you, anytime:)