Friday, 9 July 2010

Holiday Panic

Okay I'm paniking about this holiday, my sister said today that we will probably be going end of July, rather than August. This makes me panic because
1. I really need my cuts to heal
and 2. I need to lose weight.

I was 108.9Ibs as of this morning, I really want to be 99Ibs for this holiday. Do you think that is realistic. I have set myself a mini goal of being 106Ibs by Tuesday. I think if I keep setting myself little mini goals, maybe I will get close to 99 by the end of July.

I put sudacrem on my cuts last night and I swear it has made a difference already, tiny difference but hey, it's a step in the right direction.

It's really hard not to cut, but if I find that I really have to, I will cut my hip, at least I can hide it.

Thank you my wonderful, beautiful, perfect little rose petals for all your comments of late, you have no idea how much they have motivated me, and how they have made me so determined to succeed, so thank you.
Love a million times over

Intake today was 984 and I only managed to burn 271 which brings my total down to 713, not great but it's under 1000 so it will do for now.


  1. I'm glad your cuts are healing <3 So are mine :/
    I think that's pretty realistic, and you can get close at least.
    Bleh, writing this I'm realizing how much I've been falling behind as of late.
    Good luck with tomorrow, stay lovely :]

  2. I'm sure you can make 99 for the end of July! Good luck, we'll all be here to support you. And making mini goals sound like an excellent idea too (: Also, glad to hear the cuts are healing.

  3. You can make it! If you keep thinking positive and if you're very strict. Just avoid binge sessions, but if you work out, you will get there. I believe in you! Stay strong!

  4. you can do it! get to 99 by the end of july! and taking it off in smaller bits is a good idea, less overwhelming.
    about the cuts, im not sure what products you guys have over there, but i just use general antiseptic type lotion, and once the scabs are off i use bio oil. i really hope they heal, and if not, maybe you can wear a sarong type thing and say you're on your period and thats why you cant swim.
    that works for covering your weight too, if you're not happy with it.

    hope you're doing well. try not to stress about the holiday. there are so many solutions to problems if we just look for it. you should have fun instead, soak up the sun, fresh air, and put your toes in the sandy water. reflect, become one with your surroundings, all that stuff :) just try to relax.
    sorry for the essay :)
    i love you, have a fab weekend

  5. Go for short terms, realistic goals, and don0t forget to REWARD yourself when you reach your goals!!


  6. My BEAUTIFUL Rachel!

    I am so happy to hear that your cuts are healing. You can do it, remember one day at a time.

    I am also very happy to hear you are setting realistsic goals for yourself. Remember to keep a positive outlook on yourself and on what you are trying to accomplish. If you mess up once, don't let it ruin the rest of what you are doing. You fall, you get back up, its part of the journey.

    I agree with Luna: Do things that you love to do, that will occupy your mind, help you relax and take your mind off of food, weight, cutting ect...

    You are so special, dont ever let anyone including YOU tell you otherwise. You have SO MUCH to offer, don't let anyone or anything rob you of that! Hope you have an amazing sucessful week.


  7. You are beautiful inside and out. Don't let numbers control you. There are so many better things in life to focus on, so embrace this beautiful world!